The fear that people have, that I also have, of sex-positive spaces and culture is not only about sexual shame, religious and/or familial conditioning, it is also—and perhaps most profoundly—the fear of being rejected, of things not going the way one wishes, of losing one’s way, and ultimately perhaps the fear of being broken hearted. How does one cope with that?
Erotic Rope Bondage is a very powerful way to create intimacy between people. The concept of the Sydney Rope Festival is to make available a diversity of approaches to erotic rope bondage, and also show how these approaches intersect with other forms like massage, yoga and dance. Very often rope is taught as the learning of pre-given patterns of tying. In other words it is purely technical, and technical understood in a very narrow sense. Our wish is to expand your understanding of what technique is and can be and what tools you can use to cultivate the experience and the narratives we weave with rope.
Sex-positive spaces present marvellous opportunities for women to explore sexuality--to open up and try out new things in a safe environment, and to break out of the dominant culture, which pressures women have to behave in very particular ways when they come into an intimate relationship or encounter.
Sex positive spaces can provide you with opportunities for deep opening and emotional transformation, but they can also bring up your insecurities, your fears and other challenges,
I've been corresponding recently with couples who are curious about attending our events. Several have said is that while one partner may be interested to play with other people, the other may not be, or is unsure. Personally, we think it's a big mistake to try to push your partner into anything. To open up in any genuine way, it is better to feel that one has permission to go at one's own pace without pressure or expectation. That one has the ability just to be oneself. Some couples may agree to not playing outside the couple. Some may choose to be intimate in public together or try something new.
As you know, everybody today has to market themselves, including us. You can fight against it, but one way or another you have to submit to this imperative. The question is only how to do it without losing your integrity? One day when we were deciding to make a promotional video, I sat down with the team at the School of Really Good Sex, Sarah Roffey, Oliver Damian and Ira Zev, and I asked each of them what their stand-out experiences were at the Festival. What I really wanted to know was why they were working with me, what is it that had made them so passionate about the School?
A common misconception about our festivals is that it is just about going and having a lot of sex with strangers. This is not true. The purpose of our festivals is to create a sex-positive space, where, on the one hand, yes, people have permission to explore sexuality and eroticism in safety and security, but, on the other hand, it also means that people have the permission not to, if they so wish.
Many men come into sex-positive culture with the fear of not being able to connect with other people. Here is a list of some of the things one can do as a man to have more fun and grow in these spaces:
Calling to the un-known is my erotic orientation. Curating and performing In Bedtime Stories on Saturday night felt like quite an experience.